Monday, December 27, 2010

I heart my liver. What do you love?

The human body is amazing, really.  I've been reading about all of the things it does on a daily basis and I am amazed.  Sometimes those of us with chronic illnesses need to be reminded that there is so much working right with our bodies.  It is easy for me to see what is wrong with my body.  I could give you a list of labels, like: fibromyaglia, Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome, IBS, PCOS, Complex-PTSD...  I could give you a list of symptoms: chronic pain, joint dislocations, brain fog, chronic headaches, gastrointestinal problems, flashbacks, hot flashes... Do I ever sit down though, and think of all the things that my body does well?  Not really, but I should.  I think we should all give our bodies credit for all the hard work it goes through.  I know may I sound as if our bodies and ourselves were completely separate entities, but I don't mean that.  I am proud of my body.  I'm proud of my intelligence (yes, your brain is part of your body), my face, my smile, and the extra skin under my arms and on my tummy that came from losing 100 pounds.  Now the extra skin is "plumped up" because I've gained weight but I hope to "deflate" my tummy again soon.  Either way I love me.  I love my thighs, because they are strong.  I love my feet because they ground me.  I love my fingers because on days when they hurt I appreciate them so much more.  I love my liver, because I almost I almost died right before I met my DH.  I would definitely have been on the liver transplant list if it wasn't for my "hell of a liver," as the doctor in the ICU put it.  So the more I learn about the human body the more I appreciate it.  We are true works of art in motion.  We should be proud of not only who we are but our bodies and minds.  I think this is especially important with people who have chronic illnesses.

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

On the importance of thought

I realize that I haven't written here in awhile.  In fact I have been behind on all my blogs, so watch for updates on Smart Fibro Chick, Survivor, Please Tape Me Back Together, and The Disillusioned Agnostic.  I am on a fibromyalgia medication that I have stopped cold turkey.  I think my worst symptom so far has been being really shaky and it being really hard to think.

A whole bunch of needless problems are going on with the in-laws.  That's another story, and one I am not writing about now.  So, the reason I brought that up, is to stress how much stress I'm under.  I did five minutes yesterday on the new (to me) exercise bike I got off of freecycle.  I'm so proud of myself.  Of course with the fibro & ME/CFS (or does it go CFS/ME?) I'm sore extra days from exercising.

I really want to be a Mommy and that is a big reason I want to be a healthier me.  I want to get healthy for myself and for our future child (or if we are surprised, then children).  I want to be on as few medications as possible in anticipation when I have to go off them all when we are TTC (trying to conceive).  I want to have a body that can carry a child nine months.  I want to be healthy enough to be fertile and to take care of myself as an expecting and new mother and to take care of a child my DH and I bring into this wonderful world.  Because that is what it comes down to.  If the world is so horrible, then why would we all keep having children?  We feel the need to not just have sex, but to procreate because this is a wonderful world.  :-)  Smile today!